Addressing Negative Customer Experiences

A PR crisis is currently unfolding across media in Aotearoa and the organisation at the centre of it are a perfect example of what not to do. So, if you run a business and feel a bit sick every time you think about something like this, here are two pointers now you might find useful. Don't ignore the issue. Front up. It's still strangely common to receive advice to ignore something. This may have been good advice years ago when media wasn't everywhere, and things were forgotten about quickly. That doesn't happen now. If you don't put the record straight (if it's wrong) or apologise and take accountability, most of the time it sticks. People make videos about it; comments appear across all forms of media – and guess what comes up when people google you – even in several years’ time. Sometimes you can head something off before it builds up steam if you get in front of it quick enough. Respond with a well thought out statement (or video), that is honest, authentic and commit to righting the wrong. I was being roasted in the comments years ago on an article with some incorrect information. Everyone told me to ignore it, but my sense of justice wouldn't allow it. So, I ignored the advice and responded to a few of them. Did those commenters listen? No of course not, people in a rage on the internet don't care for facts 👀. But it did inform all the people who read the article and didn't comment of the truth. That is also why I respond to stupid comments on my social posts (though that's another story). Hiding under a 'no comment' doesn't work for long. And secondly, for the love of God, don't delete comments. So many organisations delete comments or stop them altogether in a panic – bad plan. It instantly makes you look guilty. Getting horrible comments hurts – I get the temptation. (And in some instances where you're getting non-stop trolls or people who won't read, sure, there may be exceptions warranted.) But stopping people from commenting just moves the conversation to somewhere you can't see (or control) it. What you should do is respond to one or two, again, setting the record straight, pin it (if you can) then let people fight it out in the comments. Keep an eye on it of course, but by stopping people having their say, you're making yourself look guilty and worse, like you're not interested in taking accountability. Censorship never comes across well. Transparency is something so many businesspeople still hate the idea of. It is the only way to make this better. The key is to be transparent, clear, empathetic and do what you say you're going to. Be accountable. Apologise if you should (and if you think you shouldn't, get some outside feedback as you may not have the best perspective...) but overall, front up.   Hiding doesn't work.   #prcrisis #socialmediacrisis #publicrelations #comms   

If our front line workers are not influencing up, we have a continuous improvement problem. The best ideas and insights come from those who are on the front lines of the business therefore their valuable perspectives MUST be heard. Most companies still have a hierarchal structure which means that front-line workers are tasked with influencing up! Simply put, this means communicating effectively with their managers to gain their support or persuade them to see things from their perspective. In a rigid hierarchical structure, this can be difficult as front line workers can have limited direct access to senior leaders and may have to pass their ideas or concerns through multiple layers of management before they reach the top. All this 'red tape' and associated delays can frustrate people to the point that they just stop trying. We also see (unfortunately) that hierarchies can create power differentials between managers and their direct reports. Managers with unchecked power and ego can create a work environment where employees feel intimidated and fearful. If any of this resonates with you, you may be interested in knowing that there are numerous ways to turn this around. Lean thinking helps a lot here! 💡 If restricted communication is the problem- simply make it a priority to spend more time with people (by going to the Gemba, facilitating daily huddles, holding Kaizen events, organizing regular town hall meetings or hosting Q&A sessions with senior leaders, where employees at all levels can directly voice their ideas and concerns. 💡 If power dynamics is an issues, why not try something like reverse mentoring: Pair senior leaders with junior staff in mentoring relationships where the junior employees share insights and feedback. This can help flatten perceived power imbalances and promote mutual respect. Leadership training is also vital in reducing these issues. 💡 If there are cultural barriers, work on promoting a culture of openness: Actively foster a workplace culture that encourages questioning and exploring ideas. Visual boards can collect people's ideas for further exploration. 💡 If psychological safety seems low, train and coach all leaders to develop psychological safety in their teams. Create team agreements between leaders and teams that clearly conveys behaviours that are out and behaviours that are in (like raising concerns and suggest improvements). 💡 If slow decision-making is an issues, streamline approval processes: simplify the decision-making process by reducing unnecessary steps and empowering more employees to make decisions at their level. Keep trying until you find ways to hear front-line workers voices loud and clear to the point that they are informing continuous change and improvements every day for better decisions and a more inclusive workplace. #lean #leanthinking #continuousimprovement #employeeengagement #inclusion #frontlineworkers #leadership

📬 What to Do When You Receive Hate Mail 📬 I recently wrote a Forbes article arguing that abandoning Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) initiatives is a critical mistake—not only for moral reasons but also because it undermines business performance, stifles innovation, and hampers long-term economic growth. My arguments drew heavily on the research findings of Mustafa F Ozbilgin, which are particularly interesting. You can read the article here: https://lnkd.in/ePp9a8zM Constructive criticism and healthy dialogue are how we improve. But sometimes, the “feedback” goes beyond critique into outright hostility, like the message I recently received this morning (see image below). It accused me of being part of a “race-based grift,” dismissed DEI as “intersectionality tripe,” and claimed that in the U.S., meritocracy is all that’s needed—no DEI, no acknowledgment of systemic inequities. It ended with the observation that people like me are “useless assholes.” Cheers. I am committed to DEI because I’ve seen how systems of exclusion shape lives—both through my professional work and in my personal life. As the only identifiable white person in my four-person household, I witness firsthand how these systems impact people in ways that are both subtle and overt. This isn’t just an abstract concept for me; it’s a reality that deeply affects the people I spend the most time with—not only my wife and children but also my collaborators. So, when I receive hate mail like this, here’s how I handle it: 1️⃣ Acknowledge the Noise, Focus on the Signal: Messages like this thrive on emotional provocation, not reasoned argument. Resist the urge to react emotionally or let them derail your focus. Instead, remind yourself of the bigger picture and the importance of the work you’re doing. 2️⃣ Turn the Hate Into Reflection: Even hostile feedback is an opportunity to revisit the data and refine your arguments. If someone disagrees, I welcome debate—but it needs to be grounded in evidence. For example, what proof is there that meritocracy alone can fix systemic inequities? Let’s have meaningful discussions, not sweeping accusations or personal attacks. 3️⃣ Recognise the Backlash as Proof of Importance: The fact that DEI generates such visceral responses shows just how essential this work is. If these conversations didn’t matter, they wouldn’t provoke such hostility. Every piece of pushback is a reminder of why advocacy for equity, inclusion, and fairness is so critical. Have you ever encountered hostility when advocating for an important cause? How did you navigate the challenges? These moments, while difficult, can serve as opportunities to foster understanding, drive personal growth, and contribute to meaningful progress.

If this had happened 10 years ago, I may have quit LinkedIn. One morning, I woke up, and saw a comment: “You and your son are two ugly people.” Back then, I wasn’t as “hardened” or prepared for the harshness of the internet. I might’ve taken it personally. I remember feeling small and vulnerable in the early days of building my personal brand. Every negative comment felt personal, like a punch to my self-worth. It made me question if putting myself out there was even worth it. The hardest ones were the personal attacks. Comments that made me feel small. Comments that made me question my worth. It stung. It made me pause and think: Why am I even doing this? But over the years, I’ve learned to see these moments differently. The problem wasn’t me. It was them. “Hurt people, hurt people.” It’s something I tell my clients all the time. And it’s something I remind myself with every hateful comment. When I stopped taking these comments personally, something shifted. I stopped seeing them as attacks. Instead, I saw them as opportunities to practice resilience, and to teach. For every hateful comment, there are countless messages of encouragement. People who tell me how much my posts have helped them. People who remind me why I keep showing up. I realized that I’m not here for the trolls. I’m here for the people who need to hear my message. So, here are three lessons I’ve learned about handling negativity online: ✅ Healthy Detachment: 👉🏻 Social media doesn’t define your worth. 👉🏻 Don’t hinge your self-esteem on likes or comments. ✅ It’s About Them, Not You: 👉🏻 People project their pain. 👉🏻 Their words say more about them than they do about you. ✅ Focus on Your People: 👉🏻 Write for those who resonate with your message, 👉🏻 Not those who are determined to tear you down. Now, when I receive comments like this, I don’t react. I file them away into my “teaching folder” and use them as examples for my clients. I’ve built a thriving coaching business, impacted thousands of lives, and helped leaders across Asia grow their brands. All because I didn’t let the trolls stop me. One hateful comment isn’t worth giving up your voice. Don’t let the fear of judgment keep you silent. The people who need to hear your voice are out there. Write for them. How about you? What do you do when you face negativity online? Let's learn from each other 🤝 P.s. ✍🏻 I am Benjamin Loh, CSP, a strategic growth coach and consultant who has taught over 65,000 leaders in over 20 global cities and constructed some of the leading icons (TOT, Award Winners) in the financial industry in Asia through the power of authentic storytelling and authority building. 💪 Follow me for personal brand and growth insights. #socialmediastrategy #personalbranding #personalgrowth #topofmind

"Amir, I just can't handle it. It makes me not want to go on - on social media or in life." "Amir, it made me feel like I was so small, a nobody." "Amir, it makes me not want to ever express my creativity again." "Amir, I'm so far behind other people. No one cares what I have to say." "Amir, I feel like every time I type or say anything, I have a target on my back." "Amir, I will always be at a disadvantage because of my gender/race/sexual orientation." Friends, your trust within the games community means the world. Daily, I receive your tens to hundreds of messages detailing struggles with personal and organizational challenges, career difficulties, and the harsh realities of social media. These discussions weigh heavily on me, reflecting wider issues within our LinkedIn conversations. These are not isolated feelings but indicators of a pervasive problem. If such conversations are not on your radar at this moment for the games industry, I encourage you to deepen your connections and trust to uncover these authentic concerns. In my four decades, the current level of stress, confusion, and self-doubt among my peers is unprecedented from what I have seen among any group I've interacted with. Comprehensively tackling these issues is beyond the scope of not just one, but many posts. Today, though, I want to address one topic I have received the most notes about in the last two weeks and aim to offer strategies for navigating the toxicity of social media in today's climate. Here's my approach: 1. I post as if I'm speaking only to my spouse and close friends. This mindset fosters authenticity and eases my concern about others' perceptions. 2. I maintain kindness but don't mistake it for weakness. I block anyone who's passive-aggressive, rude, inappropriate, or exclusionary without hesitation. 3. I value opinions only from those whose views I respect. Why should a stranger's rudeness matter to me? 4. I recognize that negative comments often reflect the commenter's issues, not my own. Envy is a common motivator behind such remarks. 5. I remind myself that online anonymity emboldens trolls. Imagining them trying to confront me face-to-face puts things into perspective. 6. I recommend LinkedIn for its professional environment, which, despite flaws, tends to be safer than other platforms. 7. Joining a supportive community offers a network of allies ready to defend you. 8. Pleasing everyone is impossible. Accept it and move on. 9. Recognize that some social media users have ulterior motives, driven by the desire for attention or controversy. 10. Social media is for fun. If you are comparing yourself to others or getting competitive, it becomes a second job, and you should stop or take a break. I'm far from perfect myself, but following 1-10 helps me get as close to 100% in ignoring toxic garbage and in avoiding self-doubt as possible. Thanks again for your trust. I will keep coming back with more advice, one topic at a time.

I watched this video and it stopped me. A football coach talking to a group of kids. He asked them a question most executives cannot answer. "You're rubbish at football. Who's got the problem? Me or you?" "Your hair looks silly. Who's got the problem?" "Nobody likes you. Who's got the problem?" The kids got it instantly. The person saying it has the problem. Every single time. There are three lessons in this, not one. 💡 Lesson one: Learn to recognise noise. When someone comes at you with negativity that has no substance, no observation, no specific behaviour, just emotion, that is not feedback. That is someone offloading their problem onto you. The discipline is simple: do not engage. Do not defend. Do not absorb. You are not the audience for someone else's bad day. Let it pass. And if that person is someone you actually have a relationship with, a colleague, a team member, you can go one step further. Not in the moment. Later. "It sounds like something was frustrating you earlier. What is actually going on?" That is not confrontation. That is care. But it only works when the relationship is there. With a stranger or a difficult customer, the move is simpler: recognise it, and let it go. 💡 Lesson two: Check if you are the one doing it. Think about the last time you were sharp with someone on your team. The last time your feedback had more edge than it needed. The last time your mood became everyone else's problem. That was not leadership. That was you making your bad day their job. Here is a rule worth installing. Not as a thought. As a team agreement. Feedback is never given in the same conversation where the frustration started. Something triggers you in a meeting? Write it down. Come back to it the next day. If it still matters, it was real. If it has faded, it was your mood, and you just saved someone from carrying your problem. That is not a good intention. That is a mechanism. And mechanisms work precisely when self-awareness does not. 💡 Lesson three: This does not mean avoid feedback. Most people hear "do not pass on your negativity" and stop giving honest feedback altogether. That is not the answer. Silence is not kindness. It is neglect. The real skill is learning to challenge people directly while making it clear you care about them personally. Kim Scott calls this Radical Candor. But the order matters. Care first. Challenge second. That means long before you ever need to say something hard, you have already invested in the relationship. You know what matters to them. You have asked how they are doing, and meant it. When that foundation exists, your hardest feedback lands as guidance, not as attack. I wrote about this in more detail here: https://lnkd.in/eKg2SJmQ Protect yourself from noise. Do not create noise for others. And when it is time to say something hard, make sure the person already knows you are on their side.

PSA: When someone says you committed a microaggression, there is only one appropriate response. "Thank you for telling me. I'm sorry. I'll never do that again." I stepped off stage a few weeks ago and a women in the audience approached me and told me (in a friendly, helpful way) that I had made a disparaging comment in my talk. When I referred to being new on Instagram, I said something dismissive like, "that's where all the kids are these days." She said, "Alison, half your audience was 20- and 30-something women who post their entire life on Instagram. For you to say it's for kids is ageist and also diminishes something they value." This was not at all my intent. My intent was to poke fun at myself by pointing out how out of my league (and old) I felt on this new social platform. But in that moment, my intent didn't matter. All that mattered was how it might have been received. So I didn't defend or explain myself. Instead, I thanked her profusely. She didn't have to come tell me, she could have badmouthed me to everyone else in the audience instead. And I would still have no idea that my joke landed poorly. She did me a favor and she didn't deserve my defensiveness. She deserved my appreciation. If you don't want people saying bad things about you behind your back, make it safe for them to say bad things about you to your face. And when you make a mistake, own it and do better. The only way to show that you're truly sorry is to not make the same mistake twice. So let me try again and say what I should have said the first time: To everyone in my network who is an Instagram whiz, I see you and I admire you. I'm not as good as you are yet, but I am trying to get better. So send any and all tips my way! #bestadvice #personaldevelopment #leadership

If You're Responding to Passive Aggressive Comments… You're Playing Their Game. (Here's the smarter approach) Everyone says, "defend yourself." But strategic silence often wins. Here's the framework: 1. Pause Before Reacting ↳ Take 24 hours minimum ↳ Emotional responses backfire ↳ Distance creates clarity 2. Assess the Intent ↳ Is it worth your energy? ↳ Will engagement help your brand? ↳ Sometimes ignoring wins 3. The High-Road Response ↳ Stay professional always ↳ Address the issue, not the tone ↳ Thank them for their perspective ↳ Redirect to productive dialogue 4. When to Ignore Completely ↳ Obvious trolling behavior ↳ No constructive point made ↳ Repeated negative patterns ↳ Protect your mental space 5. Turn It Into Value ↳ Use feedback to create content ↳ Show how you handle criticism ↳ Demonstrate your character ↳ Let your audience see your professionalism The Key Insight: ↳ Your response defines your brand. ↳ Passive aggression seeks reaction. ↳ Strategic responses build respect. Remember: Not every comment deserves your time. Quick Question: How do you handle negativity on your posts? Follow Mike Hays for more social media strategies

Empower Your Team — Don’t Chop Them Off at the Knees In leadership, your words and actions either build people up or break them down. There’s no neutral ground. Too often, well-meaning leaders unintentionally disempower their teams — micromanaging, dismissing ideas, or correcting in ways that feel more like criticism than coaching. The result? A team that’s hesitant, disengaged, and afraid to take initiative. But empowered teams? They’re confident, creative, and committed. They take ownership, solve problems, and grow — because they feel trusted and supported. Here’s how top leaders empower instead of undermine: 🔹 Coach, Don’t Control Give guidance, not orders. Ask, “What do you think is the best approach?” instead of “Here’s what you need to do.” 🔹 Praise Progress, Not Just Perfection Celebrate effort and learning. Recognition fuels motivation far more than correction. 🔹 Create Psychological Safety Make it safe to speak up, ask questions, and make mistakes. Innovation thrives in environments where people aren’t afraid to fail. 🔹 Delegate with Trust Don’t just assign tasks — give ownership. Let your team lead projects and make decisions. Trust is the ultimate motivator. 🔹 Give Feedback That Builds Instead of “You messed this up,” try “Here’s what I noticed — let’s talk about how we can improve together.” 🔹 Listen Deeply Empowerment starts with understanding. Ask your team what they need to succeed — and really listen. 🔹 Model Growth Show your own learning journey. When leaders are vulnerable and open to feedback, teams follow suit. Empowerment isn’t soft — it’s strategic. It's messy too. It’s how you build resilient, high-performing teams that thrive under pressure and grow through challenge. #Leadership #TeamEmpowerment #ExecutiveCoaching #PattyDeDominic #BusinessCulture #PsychologicalSafety #GrowthMindset #LinkedInLearning